On this page, you watch as I attempt to bring out the Roger Ebert in me. I'm not as jaded as he is though, so don't worry. Most of these movies are obscure, unusual, and just plain f@!king weird. I figured, "Hey, they can read reviews of Austin Powers: Shagged up the Ass on every review site known to man. Why don't I direct them to some movies that don't get as much recognition?" And, like most websites, I have a less than humorous label for each star rating.
**** = Cinematic Genius! *** = Good, but not without a few flaws. ** = Decent, but wait 'til it becomes an old release. * = I spent 99 cents on this? 0 = This movie took two hours of my life and I want them back!!!! So, let's get reviewin' shall we. Begotten (no star rating) Anyone remember the Morbid Angel video "Rapture?" If not, then let's just say this is 70 minutes of black and white insanity. Flesh Gordon **1/2 This is your dad's porno, so don't expect great stroke material. Come to think of it, don't expect much comedy either. Terror Firmer *** Ever wonder what goes on behind the scenes of an independent film? If you guessed blood, guts, boobs, and murderous hermaphrodites, you're right!!!!